a scar on the bright green grass

today there was momentum
like when you pump your legs
to make the swing go so high
you feel dizzy and have
to close your eyes

while walking the dogs
I see a dead sparrow
its jagged broken wing
a scar on the bright green grass
my wintered skin defrosts
under the suns blind halo

today I left my cave 
to join the world outside
starbuck's 
target
trader joe's
errant errands
to pass the tick tocking
time bomb

I hold my daughters hand
at the drugstore
when her arm winces
from the needle
I reward her with a new 
teddy bear
that she holds the rest of the day
with her unaffected arm

I cook a dinner that has meat
vegetables
and a starch
walk the dogs again
clean the kitchen
until the counters sparkle
like in a commercial
for cleaning products

today I was a good mother
I didn't listen to records backwards
I didn't drink a bottle of wine
while writing existential death poems

I read a wholesome travel book
washed my daughters new summer clothes
gave the dogs their flea meds

now that my mind is a corn husk
I hope my reward is sleep