fragmented dreams

at a hotel room
i look in a trash can
for clues

next to the staircase
in the street
i see a dead body
zipped up in an
orange sleeping bag

on a dirty table
in a makeshift clinic
i lay naked

i travel in a time machine
that looks like
a shitty one bedroom
apartment

my big grey dog 
is bleeding under a sheet
i have to adjust his oxygen tube
several times

i need to go back to 1987
because it was cheaper
to do laundry

i hold change in my hands
in the middle of an
empty yellow laundromat

time travel is bloody
there is blood everywhere
i am tired of surviving
i cry this again and again
in to the fur of my 
now dead dog

at night
i reach 1987
when i fly over the ocean
the lighthouses 
wink at me
i fail to notice the beauty
​in this