prison therapist

the nightmares won't stop
his hand is on my daughter's mouth
he only removes it if she smiles
at him and pretends that i am dead

my daughter is living with him
and it
is carving me up inside

i am a jack o lantern
on the porch steps
of an abandoned house

my face is caved in
from a brutal kick
i rot in the heat 
of his hate

the sun  is a hot poker in my side
each day that i wake
and remember
my daughter is missing

kidnapped by her father
he holds her ransom for money
he who likes to vacation
he who likes to lie
about money
he who likes to use women
as pyramid schemes

he who makes surprise 
appearances at my grandparents house
when i speak out about his abuse
this is his how 
he feels powerful

by controlling my life
with his choke hold
on my fifteen year old daughter

she can't
even  tell that she sits
when he says sit

he studied the mind
i haven't seen her since July

the last thing she told me
was that she loved me

his hand is over my mouth
i am twenty something
he says it is all in my head
when he suffocates me with a pillow


now he is a therapist
molding the minds of those who have been
hurt by people like him

he loved working in a women's prison
he mentioned how they tried to show
him cleavage for candy

didn't feel guilty 
when he masturbated in the prison bathroom
he gets off on women holding his secrets

i made him lunch
and he said he preferred the prison lunches

he was friends with prison guard
that raped  those women
and he only told me
because i was like them
raped and abused
trying to survive

he counted on me not saying anything
he told me about how they got
to visit their kids
and he keeps me from my daughter

this isn't okay
this isn't okay

they don't let my daughter eat candy
they don't let my daughter eat meat

he was a prison therapist
that let the guards rape his patients
​
he has stolen my daughter

i haven't seen her
in nine months

this is actually happening
​

​