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"Dreams are today's answers to tomorrow's questions"
- Edgar Cayce

where lies bloom like black mold

4/14/2021

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I am waiting/long days stretch in to the night./a sleepless night/as the hours pass /secrets are tossed around and hidden in corners/in some other house/my daughter sleeps/ we grow farther apart each day/ X can't keep juggling lies but he thinks he can and he will/ I suffer/ his daughter drifts in a cloud of angry confusion/ she has no roots/no loyalty/ he drags her around with his mental illusionist tricks/a dime store felon/pull those magic scarves out of your gym shorts/ come one/ come all/ watch the man with a 1000 faces/spin another web of deceit

right now he is taking her for a walk on the moon./a distant cold place where nothing grows/everything's grey/she told me they told her there was no point in feeling emotions/ a homogenized happiness as distilled as the bland vegetable diet they starve the children on/this distant planet/where everything is so carefully controlled/ so their masks won't slip/ they paint smiles on their faces with the blood of my mother heart

only happy faces/ are rewarded/ the child with the frown/ is ignored/ he has taught her quickly/trained her like he tried to train me/she can only feel here/ I get the brunt of her confused muzzled emotions/he is teaching her to act/ like he does/he took her heart/ put it in deep freeze/ handed it back to her/ so cold it burned her hand/paint a smile on your face/ this is what makes your daddy happy/don't let your face fall

now she goes/ she goes to a place/ where lies bloom like black mold/ she mocks my sad heart/tells me that lying is ok/I know she isn't my baby anymore/but I want to take her heart/hold it /melt the ice/ whisper that she doesn't need to build walls/or freeze her emotions/ break a glass baby/ scream at the top of your lungs/I will still love you/you are fire/ I will let you burn me/you don't have to keep holding up his face/it's not your job

on ¸that distant planet/where everything is locked away/ no one has the key but you/you will remember this one day/until then/ block me out/ scream at me/ tell me you don't love me/worship that perfect family facade/ I know better/here take my blood/ paint that smile on for him/I understand/dear daughter/ one day you will know/ a cold heart/is nothing to be proud of


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    Michelle Tinklepaugh


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